Sometimes it feels like life has buried us in the dirt, when in reality we've been planted with an opportunity to grow. — Tina Hallis
It’s only January, my friend, but maybe life is already feeling overwhelming and messy?
But every now and then, does a story stop you in the messy middle of the day and make you say, “Hmmm?”
Sometimes it sticks with you throughout the day and maybe longer?
You might even feel a nudge to think more deeply about the story or an idea it sparks?
THIS is the story that stopped me recently.
It’s about a donkey…and no, it’s not about being stubborn.
WARNING: Unpleasantness ahead (old fables can be distressing), but hang in there…no donkeys are harmed in this story. 🙅🏼♀️
Discover the Donkey’s Mindset
One day, a farmer heard the distressed cry of an old donkey that had fallen into an abandoned well.
The farmer struggled to pull the donkey out, but he couldn’t figure out how to save the donkey.
He made the heart-breaking decision to fill in the well 😱…
No child or animal would experience the same fate, and at the same time, he would end the donkey’s misery.
With tears flowing, he began shoveling dirt into the well.
The donkey wails horribly…
but a few shovelfuls later, he quiets down completely.
Peering into the well, the farmer can’t believe what he sees.
The donkey is shaking the dirt off as it falls on his back and then stepping up onto the rising mound.
As the pile increased, the donkey climbed closer to the edge of the well, finally reaching the top. The donkey nuzzles the farmer before trotting away. (Awww!🫏💕👩🏻🌾)
While I’ve heard this story before—maybe you have too—this week it made me stop and say, “Hmmm.”
I wondered how the Donkey’s story and mindset might apply to something closer to my journey and the experiences of the women I work with…
Like dreams…and life!
Ideas and hopes being buried under the dirt of life: distractions, doubts, and disappointments.
Like seeds…and a garden!
There’s something magical about planting a seed of new thinking and watching it grow into actionable change.
Planting a New Mindset
Dirt is shoveled on top, and the seed is buried in darkness.
To the casual observer, it may look like nothing is happening.
But beneath the surface, the seed is quietly transforming.
It’s getting rooted, drawing nourishment from the soil, and building the foundation it needs to grow strong and tall.
In its own time, it uses the soil to climb to the surface.
The very dirt that covers it becomes the fuel for its growth.
It channels water to soften the seed and protects the new, tender root from the harsh sun.
This “new story” is a powerful reminder that when life throws dirt at you—challenges, setbacks, and unseen work…
You have a choice.
You can view it as the end or as the beginning of something beautiful.
The Gardener’s Mindset invites you to welcome the dirt, seeing it as the foundation for growth and the grounding we need to thrive.
Rooted in Patience and Practice
I first embraced the Gardener’s Mindset—long before I had a name for it—when I picked up the guitar.
For over a decade, I had been the supportive parent-coach for my son’s guitar journey, taking notes during his lessons, encouraging his progress, and reinforcing good techniques.
When I finally picked up the guitar myself, I thought my years of observation would fast-track my success. After all, I had absorbed so much just by being in the room during his lessons and practices.
But growth doesn’t happen overnight.
My fingers fumbled, chords buzzed, and progress was slow.
I was buried under layers of frustration, self-doubt, and the BIG one…comparison!
But instead of giving up, I slowly embraced the quiet work.
I reflected on why I wanted to learn, broke down the challenges into manageable pieces, and returned to the basics. Each practice session became a moment to get rooted in patience and nurture my skills, one note at a time.
Like a seed buried in the dirt, I realized the early struggles were essential to my growth.
The “dirt” of frustration and mistakes became the foundation for progress.
I stopped comparing my progress to others and instead used their progress as inspiration for questions and learning.
Over time, I saw the first shoots of success breaking through.
Cultivating Resilience
The second time I unknowingly applied the Gardener’s Mindset was when I launched my coaching business. Three months later, COVID-19 turned the world upside down.
Isolation, uncertainty, and fear felt like an avalanche of dirt being shoveled over my dream. It was tempting to see the challenges as a sign to stop.
Instead, I treated that time like a season of quiet cultivation.
I reflected on why I wanted to coach and what kind of foundation I needed to build. I learned new skills, experimented with systems, and created habits that would sustain me in the long term. It wasn’t flashy or visible to others, but the work I did during that time became the roots of my business’s success.
The Gardener’s Mindset taught me to welcome the dirt—the difficult moments, the unseen work, the time to reflect and grow—as the very things that would ground me and help me thrive.
Embracing the Gardener’s Mindset
The Gardener’s Mindset is not about rushing to see results—it’s about trusting the process.
It’s about welcoming the dirt as a necessary part of growth.
Whether you’re nurturing a new idea, starting a project, or simply navigating a tough season in life, the principle remains the same: let the dirt root you and fuel your growth.
There is power in the quiet work of growth.
Each challenge holds a lesson.
Each setback holds an opportunity.
With the right mindset, even the dirt meant to bury you can become the foundation for your greatest strength.
The next time life shovels dirt your way, pause and ask yourself:
How can I let this ground me?
How can I let this grow me?
The answers might just surprise you.
