“Colors are the emotions of the soul.” —Paul Young
Emotions are such an incredible part of our lives, aren’t they?
They add various colors to our experiences, sometimes popping up in response to events, and other times surprising us out of the blue with joy or sorrow.
Like the weather, they come and go, leaving their mark on our mind and body with their unique sensations.
But sometimes, certain emotions linger longer than we’d prefer, and we wonder when they’ll finally let go of us. Grief from loss or lingering anger over past events can be tricky emotions.
Why do they stick around or show up uninvited at the worst moment?
Because they are waiting to be experienced…completely.
Because they have a message we haven’t listened to fully.
Here’s the thing…when we give ourselves the time and space to truly feel our emotions, they naturally recede, making way for new ones.
But sometimes, we hold back because the intensity of emotions like despair or rage scares us.
It’s natural to want to keep them at a distance. We don’t want them to overpower us and lead to regrets.
Our brain is doing its job…protecting us. Unfortunately, in some cases, the brain gets in the way of the healing process.
Emotions can get trapped in our body. Think of E-motions as Energy in motion. If the energy isn’t allowed to flow, it gets stuck. A helpful book that explores this in more depth is The Body Keeps the Score: Brain, Mind, and Body in the Healing of Trauma by Bessel van der Kolk.
What we resist persists.
For years, I suppressed my anger or frustration because that is what “nice girls” do. I was a people pleaser and my suppressed anger eventually threatened those relationships.
The danger came when anger appeared in full force over the smallest inconvenience. Fortunately, I recognized the overreaction, but sometimes I couldn’t understand it myself.
The problem only gets bigger because the overreaction reinforces the belief that “anger is bad,” and “I shouldn’t express my anger.”
Ugh…can you relate?
Maybe for you it was a feeling of being invisible, experiencing profound grief, or feeling like you were “too much.”
Suppressing our emotions leads to developing beliefs that hold us back and keep us playing small.
Embracing all your colorful emotions
The next time you are tempted to suppress an emotion so you can quickly move on from the discomfort, try asking yourself these questions:
- What does this emotion feel like in my body? Pay close attention to any physical sensations, tightness, or changes in energy that accompany the emotion.
- When have I felt this emotion before? Explore past experiences that might have triggered a similar emotion and try to understand any patterns or connections.
- What thoughts or memories are linked to this emotion? Dive into the thoughts and memories that arise when experiencing the emotion and see if there are any underlying beliefs or triggers at play.
- How does this emotion relate to my core values or desires? Consider how this emotion aligns or conflicts with your fundamental beliefs and aspirations. It might offer insight into your emotional needs and priorities.
- What might this emotion be trying to communicate to me? Emotions often carry messages. Inquire into what this particular emotion is telling you about your needs, boundaries, or areas that require attention in your life.
Remember, the goal is not to judge or suppress the emotion, but rather to explore it with curiosity and compassion. By engaging with these questions, you can gain a deeper understanding of yourself and your emotions, leading to greater emotional awareness and growth.
Each time you courageously sit with your emotion, you’ll discover that these challenging sensations are actually catalysts for much-needed emotional healing.
It’s amazing how that process works!
Be kind to yourself, embrace your emotions, and allow them to teach you valuable lessons on your colorful journey of healing and growth.
You’ve got this! ❤️🧡💛💚💙💜
